So last night I ate a turkey and swiss sammich on potato bread. It was the moistest, most delicate turkey I have ever eaten. mmm mmm good. It was so fresh too. I had just gotten it at Albertson's.
I think the deli counter chick has the hots for some monkey lovin'. She started talking to me recently whenever I go in there. Of course working at the deli counter she is where all the CHEESE is at so I can't ever go in there without staring at the cheese behind the counter. mmmm cheese. She calls me Sleepy, cause I always go in there after work and i'm hella tired.
Someone got caught stealing liquor. They were putting bottles of liquor down their pants and in their jacket and the deli chick called the cops. The Albertson's crew tried to close in on the fool but he knocked over a huge mountain of wine bottles and ran outside. I don't know if the cops caught him in the parking lot or not. He was too far away for me to go over and kick his ass. So just remember if you ever want to break the law and not get your ass kicked by el guapo just make sure you are outside of sprinting distance (5 feet).
So I used the fancy schmancy new self checkout again. I put my hand basket thingy down on the counter and it started freaking out (there is an automated voice that talks smack to you). It was all saying that there was unathorized items on the holding counter, whatever the hell that is. So I put the basket on the ground and it was happy. I started swiping my stuff across the laser and everything went off without a hitch. Then I paid and that was cool. Then I statted to bag my stuff. Shit broke down. It started going all wonky. It was like "UNAUTHORIZED ITEM REMOVED FROM COUNTER REPLACE ITEM POLICE POLICE EEP EEP EEEEEEEEEEEEP" and I was like, "uh..." and then I started sweating. ick. I double checked my receipt to make sure I had paid for everything. It looked ok so I just took my bags and left.
I also had tastey guapomole chips with my sammich. This morning green poop came out that looked like guac. Coincedence? I DON'T THINK SO!
So my roommate is in Vegas until tomorrow. That means I ran around naked yesterday and I'll do the same today. Naked with a big plate of fish sticks and jalapeno ranch sauce. aaaaaaaaah, the good life!
9:10 a.m. - 2003-12-02
Recent entries:
Oklahoma - 2005-11-07
Obey! - 2005-11-03
Back From Boston - 2005-10-27
Lots of Updates - 2005-10-24
Back to Work - 2005-10-10
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