Diary, diary, diary...what should I tell you about first? Maybe we should start by discussing your snazzy new look? Ok, so I spent the weekend trying to update the look of my diary. All over Diaryland I see all these cool looking diaries that people have put a lot of time and effort into and here I was with a stupid generic template diary. Well, I was starting to feel like the ugly kid who didn't get asked to the Sadie Hawkins dance...wait a minute, I am the ugly kid who never got asked to the Sadie Hawkins dance .
So I spent this weekend taking the first steps towards changing this sad fact. I started off by accquiring Adobe GoLive. A long long time ago there were these things called HTML tags and there was a small program called notepad, these were all the tools you needed to get your website up and running. Well, since then, all these way cool new things have been introduced and mere mortals such as myself could not possibly learn all about them unless I wanted to quit my job and become a web monkey 24/7. So I got Adobe GoLive, got some tutorials from the web and and on Sunday I dedicated my afternoon to updating the look of my diary.
First I hit photoshop up for some cool new navigation buttons, that was easy. Then I went to GoLive to start on the actual page. What did I end up with? 4 fucking tables, weeeeee! I couldn't of done that on my own now could I? Don't worry folks this is just Diary V1.5 for me. I will buy books and read websites that will let me unlock all of the powers of GoLive and I will give you more than 4 fucking tables. And please don't look at the source code for this page and email me to say that there are more then 4 tables, I already know. That is what GoLive does. It creates a shitload of tables when all you really need are 4.
I still can't get the scroll bar for the lower left hand table to work. I think the reason why is because GoLive has it set to automatically size itself according to the content. I probably just have to tell it that it should only be a certain number of pixels long and then the scroll bar should show up.
I also spent most of the weekend chatting with Ezi. . She offered encouragement, general support, and kept me from getting bored. Yay Ezi!
On Monday I was going to continue to work on the diary's look but The Funk called and reminded me that we were taking Mokee and her friends to Great America. So I had to jump in the car and race from Turlock to Santa Clara. By the time I got there they had already gone on a few rides and had decided to eat. So we did the usual Great America stuff. We rode the rides. I nearly pooped my pants on the Psycho Mouse ride. Kiddie ride my ass! I have a picture of me on that ride. I'll probably scan it and post it soon 'cause lord knows how I love making everyone laugh at my expense.
So Mokee and her friend Colleen decided to wear these exremely low cut, spaghetti stap tank top things. This meant that men within viewing distance were walking into stuff because they were paying more attention to the boobies that kept flopping out all the time than to what was in front of them.
If you read my previous post about Colleen you would remember that she is the tiny chinese girl with tiny boobies and nipples that are always popping through her shirt because she wears no bra. Well, Colleen's nipples were at Great American in all their glory . I have written a song about Colleen's nipples, let me sang it to ya:
Nippy, Nippy, Nipples
Popping Out At Me
Shiney, Hard, and Pointy
Like Sea Shells From the Sea
La La La La La La
La La La La Lee
Big Ole Chinese Nipples
That you can see for free
Thank you very much, I'll be performing this song in Union Square every Saturday until Chirstmas, good night folks!
7:57 a.m. - 2002-09-03
Recent entries:
Oklahoma - 2005-11-07
Obey! - 2005-11-03
Back From Boston - 2005-10-27
Lots of Updates - 2005-10-24
Back to Work - 2005-10-10
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